01/25/2004: "Sundays"

Listening to: Radiohead - The Bends
Current mood: Groggy

It's Sunday afternoon, and I really don't know quite how to feel about that.

I just got back from my weekend ritual early afternoon breakfast at Lestat's. I've gotten into this bad habit of staying up until at least 3am nearly every night lately, not really doing anything. It sort of works out that I'm watching a movie or some anime or something until roughly 2:30 at which point some bizarre impluse to do some reading kicks in and I'm up for another hour. I suppose on the plus side at least I'm still getting up around noon on the weekends so I'm not sleeping my entire life away. But then I end up back here, Sunday afternoon.

On one hand Sunday is part of the weekend and I don't really have to go out and do anything, so that's nice. On the other hand, Sundays seem to based around guilt. As I sit around playing Neverwinter Nights (or whatever) and enjoying myself I'm repeatedly bombarded by thoughts of what I should be doing instead. "It's Sunday I should go to church." says one part of my brain. "Nuts to that, I'm about to level up." says the other. "Sweet jumping monkey, this apartment is filthy." says the first. "I'll clean it up uh, on... the... weeke..nd... yeah..." says the second. And so on.

And therein lies the problem. Saturdays are great for the reason that if you don't get something you intended to do on the weekend done, well, you've always got Sunday. Sunday is more of a day to reflect on the miserable failure you've become, unable to even pull yourself together long enough to clean your room. Nevermind that your feet are lost amidst the sea of empty coffee cups, it's Sunday afternoon, the weekend is pretty much done with. You've lost any chance to redeem yourself. But then on the other hand, there's always next weekend...

(Side note: I actually did clean my room today... take that Sunday!)

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